How Can Counseling Help?

Childhood and adolescence are full of change. Children and teens are growing emotionally, socially, physically, spiritually, and relationally. They are trying to understand who they are, where they belong, and how to handle feelings that can sometimes feel too big to manage alone.

Counseling can help by offering a safe place to heal, process, and grow through the difficulties that often show up during these years.

Sometimes children and teens do not know how to explain what they are feeling. Sometimes they pull away, act out, shut down, become anxious, lose confidence, or struggle to communicate what they need. Other times, they may want help, but feel embarrassed or unsure about talking to someone.

Therapy can also help parents and caregivers better understand what their child is going through. You do not have to have all the answers before reaching out. Sometimes the first step is simply saying, “Something feels hard, and we need some support.”

What Does Child & Teen Therapy Look Like?

Depending on the treatment plan for your child, the average therapy session looks a lot like individual counseling. This means having your child meet with an individual therapist, at least once a week, to help teach children and teens healthy coping skills and process through their emotions.

This might also look like regular family sessions and opportunities for check-ins with each parent or caregiver involved in the child’s life, as needed. It is important to not overlook this element, especially when the concerns are behavioral issues, as a major component of treatment in that case will be discussing strategies to help you parent.

Is It Right For My Child?

Here are some common signs to look for to see if your child needs therapy. 

• Behavior issues at school or home

• Declining grades or academic functioning

• Exhibits anxiety behaviors (i.e. panic attacks, skin picking, hair pulling, major avoidance)

• Expresses signs of hopelessness

• Loss of interest in activities and hobbies

• Low confidence issues

• Persistent negative self-talk

• Significant changes to sleeping habits

• Talks about self-harm or suicide

• Withdrawal from social support (family and friends)

• Trouble communicating emotional needs

• Bullying, friendship struggles, or social stress

You do not have to wait until things feel unmanageable. Counseling can be helpful when your child is in crisis, but it can also be helpful when you are noticing early signs that they need more support.

How is counseling different for children/teens vs. adults?

Counseling is different from adult individual psychotherapy in that oftentimes the parents or other legal guardians may be involved in some capacity. Since teenagers are not full-grown adults and are oftentimes not in control of their environment, it is important to incorporate those who have the ability to affect and potentially change that environment.

This helps ensure that the client has the best opportunity to cultivate and practice the healthy coping skills that he or she is learning during their sessions. However, the extent of inclusion of family into treatment is determined on a case by case approach depending on the issues the teenager (or you) are looking to solve.

What are the rules about confidentiality?

Your privacy and your child’s is taken very seriously. We maintain guidelines set by HIPAA (Health Insurance Portability and Accountability Act), as well as maintain ethical guidelines set by the American Psychological Association (APA). These guidelines ensure that what is said in counseling is kept confidential; however, there are some limitations.

These limitations deal with the knowledge of possible child or elder abuse, or the suggestion of harm to yourself or others. It is important to understand that counselors are mandated reporters, and are required to report certain information, as listed above, to the proper authorities.

If you have any questions about confidentiality, please do not hesitate to ask, and your therapist can clarify your questions directly.

Will I be privy to what my child says during his/her sessions?

As the legal guardian and/or parent, you do technically have legal access to information from sessions until your child turns 18 years old. However, if your child is 14 years or older, it is often best to allow your child the privacy of talking to with their therapist, without the fear in the back of their head that you’ll get the play-by-play of what is said.

This is fundamental for their therapist to be able to build trust with your child, and is important to best ensure a safe environment where the teen feels at ease to open up fully about the difficulties they are facing.

Oftentimes, if a teen feels like they lack privacy away from their main caregivers, they are more reluctant to share in full truth what is going on with them, thus hindering the counseling process. It is important to remember, however, that in the event there is a serious concern that is raised, the therapist will always relay important information to you to protect the safety of your child.

How often does my child need to see their therapist?

The frequency of therapy is determined by the treatment plan set for your child. After your child's intake session, you should have a good idea about how many sessions they will need in a week, and what type of therapy is best suited for their goals. Regular attendance to counseling is encouraged, to help you child meet their therapeutic goals in a timely manner.

How long will they have to be in therapy?

Again, the length of therapy is determined by their treatment plan and the progress they are making between their counseling sessions. Regular conversations about progress will be held on a regular basis. These conversations will help in keeping everyone on the same page, and updated to help determine estimated length of therapy.

Are counselors able to prescribe medication?

As therapists, our team members are unable to prescribe medication to your child, a psychiatrist or physician is needed for that service. However, we are more than willing to work closely with your primary care physician and/or psychiatrist to make sure that your child is getting the best treatment possible.

Best practice in pharmacological treatment (i.e. medication management) often calls for psychotherapy to be delivered along with the meds. It will be important to assess your satisfaction (and theirs) with the prescriptions they’re taking, and monitor their effectiveness.

Can counselors help coordinate with IEPs (Individualized Education Program) and 504 plans?

Every school system has a different way to determine these plans for their students. Please reach out to your teen's school to find out what is needed for documentation. Oftentimes, the school system has everything needed internally to help set up these plans.

What happens during an intake session?

An intake session is the first session with a counselor. For teens, this means that both they and their guardian needs to be present. This first session focuses on gathering information about what is bringing you & your child into therapy at this time, and any mental health history you may have.

This includes any prior treatment, current and past medications, family history, and a synopsis of the current events that have led you to seek counseling at this time. It tends to run longer than a normal session due to the amount of information that needs to be gathered to help determine the best treatment plan for your family.

It may be appropriate, especially on a first session to meet with you and your teen separately. We find that this helps both individuals involved to be able to share their understanding of what’s going on and why they are in therapy.

Ultimately, this first session helps lay out the foundation for what counseling would look like specifically for you and your child. This means identifying the treatment problems, and gaining an understanding of what it would mean for therapy to be “successful”, and what therapy/treatment would be needed to help you reach your therapeutic goals. 

My teenager is refusing to go to counseling, what should I do?

Try first to have an open and honest conversation with your child about their fears and hesitancy towards counseling and see if there is anything that can be resolved by providing them more information or assurance. Listen closely and validate what they are saying. If they are struggling with an emotional issue, you can share that many people often find relief in talking to a therapist. If it is a behavioral issue, you may want to consider setting some limits on technology or denying access to privileges until they speak with a therapist.

If all else fails, seek counseling for yourself without your child. Many times there are skills and tools you can learn that will be extremely helpful to them and for yourself. Oftentimes, teens will become interested in your counseling journey if they feel like it has something to do with them. They may even want to defend their side of the story to your counselor, leading to a family therapy session. Either way, you will walk away with some new communication skills, or have newfound confidence to set rules and follow through!

What Will My Friends Think?

In life, absolutely everybody experiences problems in one way or another. Everybody needs support and could use a little help to make sense of those problems and deal with them in the best way possible. There is no shame in seeking some extra support beyond what your friends can provide.

If you choose to tell your friends, their reaction to the news will give you a clue into how supportive they really are. If they truly value your friendship and want the best for you, they will be understanding and supportive. You may even be surprised by their support.

Deciding that you are unhappy with the status quo, and wanting to work on things in your life is an incredibly brave and courageous step.

Don’t let the fear of what other people will think hold you back from doing something that’s right for you.

What if I don’t feel comfortable talking about my problems?

You’re not alone if you have a hard time talking about your problems. Many teens have no issue discussing the latest drama from school, but find it incredibly difficult to talk about what’s really going on inside them.

Sometimes it takes a bit for you to feel comfortable opening up, and this is okay! Our therapists will do their best to meet you in a supportive and non-judgmental way, but you are the one who has to make that initial step of faith.

It is incredible how much better people feel, and how quickly their life improves when they are brave enough to ask someone for help. None of us can begin the journey of our life completely alone.

A problem that is shared with the right person becomes a problem that can be understood and solved.